I needed a table at Maxim’s, a hundred bucks, and a gorgeous blonde; what I had was a leg of lamb and no clues. I took hold of the joint. It felt cold and damp, like a coroner’s handshake. I took out a knife and cut the lamb into pieces. Feeling the blade in my hand I sliced an onion, and before I knew what I was doing a carrot lay in pieces on the slab. None of them moved.—from “LAMB WITH DILL SAUCE À LA RAYMOND CHANDLER”If you’ve ever wondered what it would be like to make dinner with Franz Kafka, Jane Austen, or Raymond Chandler, this is the chance to find out.   Literary ventriloquist Mark Crick presents fourteen recipes in the voices of famous writers, from Homer to Virginia Woolf to Irvine Welsh.  Guaranteed to delight anyone in love with food and books, these witty pastiches will keep you so entertained in the kitchen that you’ll be sorry when the guests arrive. Read Less