A practical guide to responsible divorce examines the complex problems that arise as spouses separate while remaining linked by parenthood and offers advice on coping with potential crises and the transition to a "binuclear" family
The good divorce? Impossible? In this provocative, groundbreaking, and authoritative new book, internationally acclaimed social scientist and family therapist Constance Ahrons defines the good divorce and shows how couples can achieve one. Counteracting the myths that divorce inevitably turns adults into bitter enemies, results in damaged children and broken homes, and rips apart the fabric of society, Dr. Ahrons focuses on what we can learn from those families that maintain family bonds and continue to meet the needs of their children.Drawing on her two decades of landmark research and clinical practice with families of divorce, Dr. Ahrons makes clear that in order to improve the lives of half the families in America, we must remove the stigma of divorce; redefine the divorced family as a "binuclear," rather than a "single parent," family; regard "family values" as the cornerstone to healthy families, whether they are binuclear or nuclear; help parents and children establish new roles, rules, and rituals to support the new family structure; and take advantage of divorce strategies and parenting solutions that help - rather than hinder - healthy development.Dr. Ahrons gives us more than ideas for self-help, she walks us through the lives of families at every stage of divorce to teach us what works and what doesn't. She shows us how to make the most of the families we know we have, rather than dreaming in vain for an unattainable ideal. The Good Divorce serves as a powerful tonic for the millions of couples and parents, whether they are divorcing now or have been divorced for many years, who are tired of hearing only the damage reports. Here is a hopeful, practical book, neither pro-divorce nor anti-marriage, that will change the way we think about divorce and the way we divorce, reconfirming our commitment to children and families.